CARMEN. I’m on the bathroom floor, sweat drips off of me, overkill Eating pity, crying out for someone, anyone, to hold me Carmen, do you remember me? Do you know my lips still? I feel your eyes on me throughout every hour I see your face all the time I can feel you speak into my ear I’m repressing something, choking on it, make myself sick from it I still love you, I sold myself I only remember your car And all I write is your name on my skin again I bring us to life, I create a world Yeah, I consume what’s left of you They tell me something I believe it’s not I saw you staring, do you care? I’m kissing scars on my best friend’s chest They remind me so much of the things you’d create Carmen, every award I’ve won, I see your brown eyes narrow And I become something that I promised you I wouldn’t Cause in the end, you still did what you did The words you spoke, wrote, carved into my head I wonder if you want me, if you miss me at all Is this how you leave me, Carmen? Carmen, Carmen, Carmen I bring us to life, I create a world Yeah, I consume what’s left of you They tell me something I believe it’s not I saw you staring, do you care? I’ll be an attraction, singing bird in a cage A fever dream you experience once a week On every platform you scrape ‘Til you can’t avoid me, can’t escape my pain, fear You’re in my intestines, weaving in and out of my blood The only thing that changes is the wind in your hair And I’m trying hard to become someone you think of It’s a form of self-deprecation that you can’t comprehend I’ll prove you wrong I’ll make you want me again Oh, please, please, please can’t you see? I’m the one for you I’m the one you want I’m proving you wrong Oh, please, please, please can’t you see? I’m throwing back shots of pain until I can finish this And starling, darling bird, I think you’ll watch I’m dreaming that you’re the paparazzi And starling, babydoll, I know you’ll watch I see you in the corner in my prison cell of a mind You’re in the canister of dreams You watch me whine at their feet, strive to be great I know you love me, Carmen, deep down inside I’ll bang my head against my fist until I can’t remember you I miss you, Carmen, but I won’t really want you back You’re growing older by the millisecond, love fades I saw your best friend’s sister, she knows, doesn’t she? I know now what you have, what’s gone from me I know now what you have, what’s gone from me